Wednesday, May 31, 2006

 

A Jump-Start on the Pointless Shit

It's hard to really get in the proper frame of mind for Mega-Bitch Wednesday when I now have an operating Subaru. After about a month without a car, the Rip-aru is running once again thanks to the engine out of a Subaru that was totaled in a rear-end collision. In truth, I just can't find anything to bitch about.

So, onto the next daily feature of The Globex Corporation Newsletter the feature lovingly referred to as Pointless Shit.


confidential


Look, I'm sure that moving the chairs from the conference rooms to master control is just about the biggest thing that management in my corporation (the one I work for, not this one) has to worry about. I sincerely doubt that I'll receive any disciplanary action for revealing this confidential information. Use the word "confidential" for Pointless Shit like this and the word will soon lose all meaning.

As I am in danger of having an actual point on this hallowed day I will sign off early.......

BOJ

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

 

A Very Special Edition of Positive Tuesday

What to be positive about today.....

Let's see, I guess I could be positive about the fact that my dad put a new (only 70,000 miles) engine in the Subaru and I'm heading back to the RC (actually the BE) early in the morning. I will be driving the 300 mile trip in a car that doesn't have cruise control. There was a time when I took much longer trips in cars without that amenity, but it's been 10 years since I've had to watch my speed like that, so it's an annoyance. I predict that I'll make it there, though and I'll have a good portion of Tuesday to continue to be positive about.

Hope to catch an open mic or two, need to give TSA a call and see if he can do Dunn Bros. I'd like to get to Bully Blends and do a tune or two, though they frown even more on some of my material that I do solo. We'll just have to see.....

BOJ

Monday, May 29, 2006

 
DHMOcontam

dhmobanner

Saturday, May 27, 2006

 

MLB Fines Russ Springer Negative $50,000 For Throwing At Bonds

I usually don't do this word for word, but here's an Onion Article about Barry Bonds.

HOUSTON—Astros relief pitcher Russ Springer has been awarded $50,000, the largest negative fine in baseball history, for intentionally throwing at Barry Bonds last Tuesday, the Astros reported. "After reviewing the tapes, there is no question in my mind that Springer purposefully attempted to strike Bonds, and therefore we have no choice but to give him the stiffest negative financial penalty possible," MLB vice president of on-field discipline Bob Watson said Wednesday. "Rest assured that we intend to deal with similar assaults on Bonds in at least this aggressive a fashion." Springer has said that he does not intend to contest either his fine or the mandatory five-day Tahitian resort suspension he has been scheduled to serve this offseason.


My favorite part of this story is that the pitcher's name is Springer. Dear God, could it be any more perfect. You know, freakshow baseball meets freakshow TV. I want to go to the next game the Astros play in Colorado so I can start a chant of "Jer-ry! Jer-ry! Jer-ry!" the next time Springer takes the mound.

BOJ

Labels:


Friday, May 26, 2006

 

Sue Foley Photo Friday

A World Of Pain

No comment. Enjoy the photo!

BOJ

Thursday, May 25, 2006

 

F*#! Kenneth Lay

french
Hey Kenny-Boy! Sorry you're
broke but why don't you sell one
of those fucking suits to
pay for a new engine
for my Subaru....
On September 11th, 2006, convicted felon Kenneth Lay will most likely be sentenced to spend the rest of his life in jail. Convicted of six Federal counts of conspiracy and fraud, the former Enron CEO must now surrender his passport and post a 5 million dollar cash bond. As Kenny-Boy claims he is broke, his children will be forced to risk their own homes to keep their father a free man until September.

HOW DARE WE!!!!!

Kenneth Lay is a human piece of shit who lined his pockets with what should have been corporate profits, but how can this nation, in good conscience, allow Lay's children to be forced to risk their homes on their father's behalf? It's not like his actions put any innocent people at financial risk.... Wait a second, they did. Thousands of Enron employees had their retirment funds plundered by this heartless animal. Not only former employees are at risk, but those employees' families. The employees and families of all of the businesses that those employees frequented, the employees and families of companies that did legal or illegal business with Enron are at risk.

Kenneth Lay is broke. I wonder how many of the homes he bought during his pilfering days are still owned by Lay. Kenneth Lay showed up for court today in a suit of clothes that would more than likely cost enough to pay my expenses for three or four months. Since he's been in court for a number of months now, you know he had more than one. Need $5,000,000? Have a fucking garage sale, bitch. I'm sure all of the shit that you bought with money you stole from the employees of Enron could raise a tidy sum. Putting the homes of your children at risk instead? You are a miserable piece of shit.

And prison? What kind of prison do you think Kenny Lay will be going to? I suggest that the government keep tabs on every former Enron, check to see how they're doing financially, if they're out of work or broke or living on the fucking street. If one of them would be better off in the country club lockup that Lay will be attending then Kenny-Boy should be brought down to their level. Sure, a homelss person has freedom, but it's funny how revolutions don't happen when the people are starving. Ask Maslow, physiological needs take precedence over abstract ideas like freedom.

Why do I fucking care? Because I do. I hate to see people get fucked around like the Enron employees did. To work hard for a company, to put your hard earned money into company stock at the management's urging while the same management is selling their stock in droves (which the goverment seemed to think was OK, 'insider trading' charges came back innocent).

But it's a little more personal than that. I lived in California while Enron ARTIFICIALLY CREATED POWER SHORTAGES to create more revenue for themselves. I had to deal with rolling blackouts, higher prices for goods, higher prices for everything because of those greedy assholes. The residents of California were so pissed off that they ran the governor out of office and elected Schwartzenegger, Arnold Fucking Schwartzenegger, you know, the actor, the guy from that piece of shit movie Predator. Who would possibly believe that anyone would elect an actor in that piece of shit to lead their state?

During the time of the complete fake power shortages, I work for a company that used a lot of electricity. They used it bounce RF signals off of satellites. They kept open facilities that used copious amounts of electricity. Electricity that more than doubled in price. For that reason and many more (some real, some corporate fantasy) 35% of the workforce was eliminated. I wonder how many years of my salary Enron sucked out of DirecTV during this completely imagined power shortage.

Kenneth Lay lives better than I do today even though he's broke. Yet he still feels the need to try to screw his family, his fucking family, to continue to sell the lie.

BOJ

 

I Dream of Pointless Shit

Lanthinides

No. Element

57 Lanthanum
58 Cerium
59 Praseodymium
60 Neodymium
61 Promethium
62 Samarium
63 Europium
64 Gadolinium
65 Terbium
66 Dysprosium
67 Holmium
68 Erbium
69 Thulium
70 Ytterbium
71 Lutetium


Actinides

No. Element

89 Actinium
90 Thorium
91 Protactinium
92 Uranium
93 Neptunium
94 Plutonium
95 Americium
96 Curium
97 Berkelium
98 Californium
99 Einsteinium
100 Fermium
101 Mendelevium
102 Nobelium
103 Lawrencium

BOJ

 

F*#!

french
From The Onion. F*#! Barry Bonds!
It's from, The Onion, baby, so you better believe it's real!

Much like Ford Frick's asterisk on Roger Maris' Home Run record in 1961, Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig has announced that a similar symbol will appear next to Barry Bonds' name in the record book.

That symbol will be the letter 'F' followed by an asterisk, followed by a pound sign, and ending in an exclamation point.

To quote Bud Selig from an article in The Onion:

"F*#! Barry Bonds, 714 F*#!^&% home runs," Selig said, reading a line out of the most updated version of this year's record book. "F*#! Barry Bonds."


For once I am in complete agreement with Bud Selig.

BOJ

Labels:


Wednesday, May 24, 2006

 

How Can Victoria's Secret Find Me When Black Hills Corporation Is So Fucking Clueless?

french
Honestly, I still get this in the
mail because I used to have a
girlfriend.....
Buy a woman one bra and garter belt set and Victoria's Secret won't leave you alone. As you know, I moved to Cheyenne, Wyoming from the RC about 4 months ago. I had moved to the RC from Long Beach, California primarily because I'd be closer to 5-55 who lived in the RC who I met over Christmas while visiting family. While living in Long Beach, I went to visit 5-55 and thought it might be nice if I bought her a little something for playtime. OK, it was really a gift for me, but she seemed to enjoy when I bought that kind of stuff for her nearly as much as I did.

The easiest way to buy her sexy little items was through Victoria's Secret's website. So I got their catalogue in the mail monthly as well. I moved to the RC to be with 5-55, something happend the first day I was in town (I've often called it a "fight" but that isn't really true - it was really just something, that I still don't understand, that made her not want to sleep with me anymore). So no girlfriend anymore. A few months later, I got a Victoria's Secret catalogue in the mail. I'll admit it, I like looking at the Victoria's Secret catalogue and I'm not complaining that it comes to my home monthly. But this thing follwed me from California to South Dakota, and this past week it found me in Wyoming.

When I moved to Cheyenne I went down to Cheyenne Light Fuel and Power to get the billing transfered to me. I was asked who my previous power company was and was informed that unless I got a letter from my previous power company stating that I was a good customer, that my account was up to date and paid promptly that I would have to pay a deposit. I really wasn't in the mood for any more hassle at that point (the Echostar hiring process was enough pointless hassle for a lifetime), so I agreed to pay a deposit. It would be $300 spread out over 3 months and would appear on my bill.

When my first bill arrived it looked kind of familiar. It looked a lot like the bill I used to receive from Black Hills Power and Light. Upon further inspection I found out that Cheyenne Light Fuel and Power and Black Hills Power and Light were both owned by Black Hills Corporation. I was asked to get a letter from my previous power company when my new power company and my previous one are part of the same corporation. I was expected to use my time to prove that I was a good customer when with a click of a mouse I'm certain that this information could have been obtained by Cheyenne Light Fuel and Power.

And Black Hills Power and Light knew I was in Cheyenne. I provided them with a forwarding address. They even sent me one more bill even though I had the power disconnected and was not liable for another bill.

Yet Victoria's Secret can find me accross three states and two time zones. Victoria's Secret reminds me monthly that I no longer have a girlfriend. In their defense, they do provide me a catalogue full of women to look at every month. If I don't have a girlfriend at least I've got hot chicks to look at. In lingerie. OK, I guess this isn't so bad.

Black Hills Corporation is staffed by complete fucking morons, though.

BOJ

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

 

Copyright Infringement
or
A Parade of Facial Hair

A World Of Pain

Dante

Casablanca

Doogie w- Chain Gun
I watched Tne Big Lebowski with neighbor Tim this afternoon. It reminded me of the first photo, done by a guy I worked at DirecTV with by the name of Jon Law. Actually, all four of these are by Mr. Law. Before that time I didn't even know that this type of photo manipulation was easily possible by the average computer geek.

Thank heavens it is! And thanks to Jon Law for showing me the way!

BOJ

 

Congrats 83.44.159.212, You're Visitor #11,000!!!

At 19:13:28 Mountain Time this evening, The Globex Corporation Newsletter topped 11,000 page loads since sometime in 2005. See, I don't know how many page loads exactly since 31 December 2004 because I didn't have a counter attached to this blog for the first couple of months.

Visitor #11,000 is from Spain and accidentally found this inconsequential corner of the internet by searching "MELISSA PUENTE VIDEO" on the Blogger search tool. That pointed our Spanish friend to the Pointless Shit Thursday post in which I listed all of the winners of the daytime Emmy awards. I'm finding that Pointless Shit seems to get a lot of weird hits to this blog, for which I am quite grateful. Love to confuse people on other continents.

Visitor #11,000 was using Internet Explorer on a PC running Windows XP. I don't know his name, but I'll just assume it's "Pablo."

BOJ

 

Good Eats

french
That's right, my favorite TV show
is a cooking show.....
Depending on how you look at it, it makes a lot of sense or it's very odd how much TV I actually watch. I pretty much watch 8 hours of TV at work, though my attention to any given program is pretty much based on when program starts, when it ends and if there's any ridiculous amount of black in the middle of it that isn't supposed to be there.

The TV I watch on my own time tends to be informational. I'm a bit of a news junkie so if the TV is on during the day it's CNN, MSNBC or ocasionally Fox News. I do tend to watch a bit of The History Channel and National Geographic as they tend to have information based programs.

For entertainment purposes, I watch Jeopardy! as much as my schedule allows and I still really like The Simpsons and Family Guy. I enjoy Conan O'Brien when I get off work and whatever Cartoon Network is running before I go to bed.

That's about the extent of the TV I religiously watch. There is one more show, though. It combines the information I crave and just enough silliness to keep me interested. It's a little program called Good Eats on Food TV.

One of my hobbies is cooking. I like to cook and I grew up in a household where we ate out very seldom. My mom is a good cook and a good teacher so I picked up a lot of knowledge from her. The bulk of the rest of my culinary knowledge comes from Good Eats host Alton Brown.

Think of Good Eats as a cross between a traditional cooking show and Bill Nye the Science Guy The show is just damn entertaining with a cast of returning characters (W, the operator of a kitchen supply store is my favorite) and running gags. Alton Brown's training was in Theater, cooking was simply a hobby. The show is well paced an logically well done in a very entertaining way.

But my favorite thing about Good Eats is the massive amount of information contained in every show. As a cooking show it's not particularly recipe based, but more informationally based. Every episode has a theme, one show will be about Strawberries, the next will be about Artichokes, Alton Brown even did a show about homebrewing (I had some issues with some of his techniques, but the information was all sound). The history of the food stuff will be discussed, basic cooking techniques will be given. Strange visual aids and vignettes will be shown to help exlain techniques and the whys of some pretty advanced food science. Yeah, he cooks, but that tends to be a bit secondary to the show. I do make AB's Macaroni & Cheese recipe though. It's a real basic recipe that I can sort of do my own thing with, and no, it does not require me to open that blue box from Kraft containing the "Hunter Safety Orange" powder. You know, hunters wear that color because it doesn't occur in nature......

Good Eats presents pretty advanced food science and what could be dry cooking segments with a fantastic degree of humor and ingenuity. If The Onion had a Food section, it would be very much like Good Eats. And like The Onion, I urge you to check it out.

BOJ

Monday, May 22, 2006

 
dhmousers

For those who still doubt the deadly consequences of DHMO use, follow the link below.


dhmobanner


And just a tiny bit of housekeeping. This is the very first official DHMO Monday post. With the help of you, the fine readers, The Globex Corporation Newsletter hopes to be instrumental in wiping this insidious chemical compound from the face of the earth.


BOJ

 
PANTSGRAPH

Scientific study conducted by The Globex Corporation based on days off and Echostar policy that shorts can be worn to work on Friday through Sunday. The fact that I hate shaving has also been factored into the raw data.

BOJ

Saturday, May 20, 2006

 
weather

I know that I've said before that I try to avoid the gratutitous swearing on this blog, but this is the weather we've talking about. Al Roker could learn something from this.....

BOJ

Friday, May 19, 2006

 

Sue Foley Photo Friday

french
My fault for leaving Minnesota in 1999.....
Another Sue Foley photo Friday is upon us. This photo is from the 2000 Bayfront Blues Festival in Duluth, Minnesota.

I attended the 1998 Bayfront Blues Festival. The highlight was Susan Tedeschi, another fine looking blues guitarist. Tedeschi also has a real woman's voice, reminiscent of Janis Joplin, as opposed to Sue's "little girl" voice. But Tedeschi can't hold a candle to Sue Foley as a guitarist. That said she's quite a guitarist, is married to The Allman Brothers Band lead guitarist Derek Trucks and has a young son by him who I'll be looking for albums by in about 15 years.

BOJ

Thursday, May 18, 2006

 

Return of the Living Pointless Shit

WWF/WWE Champions
comments by BOJ in italics



Buddy Rogers 04-29-63
Bruno Sammartino 05-17-63
Ivan Kolof 01-18-71
Pedro Morales 02-08-71
Stan Stasiak 12-01-73
Bruno Sammartino 12-10-73
Superstar Billy Graham 04-30-77
Bob Backlund 02-20-78
The Iron Sheik 12-26-83 def. The Iron Yuppie
Hulk Hogan 01-23-84
Andre the Giant Year not available
Randy Savage 03-27-88 defeated opponent with a Slim Jim
Hulk Hogan 04-02-89
Ultimate Warrior 04-01-90 def. Less than Ultimate Opponent
Sgt. Slaughter 01-19-91 on 3 day pass
Hulk Hogan 03-24-91
Undertaker
Hulk Hogan 12-03-91
Ric Flair 01-19-92
Randy Savage 04-05-92
Ric Flair 09-01-92
Bret Hart 10-12-92
Yokozuna 04-04-93
Hulk Hogan 04-04-93
Yokozuna 06-13-93
Bret Hart 03-20-94
Bob Backlund 11-23-94
Diesel 11-26-94 environmentally friendly, runs on soy oil
Bret Hart 11-19-95
Shawn Michaels 03-31-96
Sid 11-17-96
Shawn Michaels 01-19-97 In Wham! with Andrew Ridgely
Bret Hart 02-16-97
Sid 02-17-97
Undertaker 03-23-97
Bret Hart 08-03-97
Shawn Michaels 11-09-97
Stone Cold 03-29-98 def. Unseasonably Warm
Kane 06-28-98
Stone Cold 06-29-98
The Rock 11-15-98 Actual name: Al Catraz
Mankind 01-04-99
The Rock 01-24-99
Mankind 01-31-99
The Rock 02-15-99
Stone Cold 03-28-99
Undertaker 05-23-99
Stone Cold 06-28-99
Mankind 08-22-99
Triple H 08-23-99 def. Hubert Humpherey in Wisconsin primary
Mr. McMahon 09-16-99
Triple H 09-26-99
Big Show 11-14-99
Triple H 01-03-00
The Rock 04-30-00
Triple H 05-21-00
The Rock 06-25-00
Kurt Angle 10-22-00 Signature move: "The Hypotenuse"
The Rock 02-25-01
Stone Cold 04-01-01
Kurt Angle 09-23-01
Stone Cold 10-08-01
Chris Jericho 12-09-01 Insert Biblical joke here
Triple H 03-17-02
Hulk Hogan 04-21-02
Undertaker 05-19-02
The Rock 07-21-02
Brock Lesnar 08-25-02
Big Show 11-17-02
Kurt Angle 12-15-02
Brock Lesnar 03-30-03
Kurt Angle 07-27-03
Brock Lesnar 09-18-03
Eddie Guerrero 02-15-04
JBL 06-27-04 Won a set of really crappy speakers
John Cena 04-03-05
Edge 01-08-06
John Cena 01-29-06

Got an idea for the next edition of Pointless Shit? Post it in the comments. Maybe I'll steal it and claim it as my own!

BOJ

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

 
dorkiest

Alright, Cheyenne made the top 5! A great accomplishment, to be sure, but throw the American South into the mix and we're not even top 100.....

BOJ

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

 

A Brief Positive Tuesday

I'm not ignoring the fact that it's Positive Tuesday today. Quite the contrary. Today was a fantastic Tuesday. A replacement engine was found for the Subaru at a very reasonable price. I did some laundry. I spent a little time playing guitar in the park. I fixed an nice supper. I had a few glasses of a amber colored alcoholic beverage that wasn't beer.

I simply enjoyed the day so much that I haven't spent a lot of time at the computer. On a 70 degree day in May in Cheyenne, Wyoming you sure as hell don't want to spend too much of it in the house. I tried not to.

Not having to amp myself up for a Positive Tuesday post, I make no guarentees about tomorrow's Mega-Bitch Wednesday. If it's another day like today, that will be a pretty hard post to write.

BOJ

Monday, May 15, 2006

 

DHMO Enhancing Sports Performance?

french
Slugger Barry Bonds as a Rookie...
french
Bonds exhibiting swollen tissues
due to DHMO use?
Clearly DHMO is a dangerous chemical compound. The Government has spent millions of dollars creating an effective DHMO delivery network and have spent a good amount of time and effort convincing us that it is safe.

And in truth, DHMO has it's place in medicine in science. While inhalation of DHMO can be fatal, Doctors routinely use DHMO in IV's for patients suffering a variety of maladies. DHMO is used in the dialysis process and aids in recovery from dehydration.

Yes just like anabolyc steroids, DHMO has uses in medicine. Unfortunately, athletes have found both of these subratances to be performance enhancing. Since at least the mid 1980's, athletes have been using DHMO in the major professional sports and its use has become rampant in Olympic competitions as well.

Certain amounts of DHMO can actually enhance performance, allowing the brain and body to work more efficiently, aiding in ridding the body of other toxic chemicals, even aiding in the absorption and digestion of food. Too much can cause trouble bloating the body and causing swelling of tissues.

Take the case of San Francisco Giants slugger Barry Bonds. As Bonds closes in on Babe Ruth's career home run total, we hear the whispers of steroid and human growth hormone use. While he has tested positive for neither of these substances, Bonds last league mandated test showed large amounts of DHMO in his urine. Why hasn't Bonds been run out of the league. It's simple really, DHMO IS COMPLETELY LEGAL!!!! Does DHMO make Bonds' body more efficent in the absorption and digestion of food? Does DHMO allow Bonds to recover from exhaustion more quickly than it would without DHMO? Of course, and no doctor would argue the point with me.

Major League Baseball refuses to acknowledge the DHMO problem among its players, arguing that DHMO is a completely safe supplement. Yet, this past Friday a game at Boston's famed Fenway Park was shortened due to DHMO contamination and players and fans alike were forced to leave the premesis. This contamination could not be cleaned up and games against the Texas Rangers were cancelled on both Saturday and Sunday.

Comissoner Bud Selig fully suports the evacuation of stadiums due to DHMO contamination but turns a blind eye to athletes using THE VERY SAME SUBSTANCE as a performance enhancing substance. Would home run totals around the league fall substantially if DHMO were banned among players? Would less home runs decrease the number of fans attending games? Would less fans hurt the bottom line of the ball clubs and the league as a whole? You bet it would! Selig will do nothing about this rampant problem in his league until forced to do so.

And there's the rub, the Goverment will never force baseball to clean up their act. The US military regularly provides DHMO to soldiers in the field, they have too much invested in DHMO technology to speak poorly of it.

It's up to right-minded outlets like The Globex Corporation Newsletter to get the word out. DHMO is a killer! Wake the kids, phone the neighbors! Spread the word about the dangers of DHMO!



dhmobanner


BOJ

Saturday, May 13, 2006

 

DHMO Update


dhmobanner

I've been obsessed with my DHMO research. Until a few days ago, I didn't realize what a terrible worldwide problem this has become.

The United States is a huge DHMO polluter, dumping it into our lakes and rivers, spraying it onto our crops in an attempt to create greater yields and using it in its solid form as an industrial coolant.

The rest of the world cannot be without blame, however. Every Coninent shows evidence of DHMO, even Antartica. Countries do not confine the release of DHMO to their own borders. Canadian industry, for example, releases tons of DHMO into the Great Lakes every year. This chemical compound eventually finds its way to US shores where it causes all of its well doccumented problems.

Ocassionally, if weather conditions are right, DHMO on the surface of the Great Lakes will be picked up by wind currents, solidify in the atmospere and be deposited on American cities. Between January 28th and February 1st, 1977, Candian DHMO fell on the American city of Buffalo, NY, accumulating to depths of EIGHT FEET in some places, 29 deaths being attributed to the phenomenon. The Canadian government continues to deny any responsibility for the deaths of American citizens.

Wake up people! DHMO is a global problem! We need to wipe it out today!


dhmobanner

BOJ

Friday, May 12, 2006

 

Sue Foley Photo Friday!!!!

french
Some really great photos of Sue at this site
Once upon a time I married a photographer. She said I looked really great in Black and White.

So does Sue Foley. I sort of have a thing for redheads and that's a little bit lost in this photo. No trouble, she's still one fine lookin' woman.

Sue is a fine guitarist as well. I'm still waiting for New Used Car to hit the music stores. Then again, I do live in Cheyenne, Wyoming. Maybe I should take matters into my own hands, I'm sure it's available somewhere on the internet.

BOJ

Thursday, May 11, 2006

 

BAN DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE

I try not to be an alarmist, but I ran across this on the internets not long ago. If it's on the internet, it's gotta be real, right.

In any case, I've done a little bit of research, and all of the claims about this sinister chemical compound can be confirmed. This is dangerous stuff, people. We have to do what we can to ban this horrible substance.

BAN DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE!

dhmobanner



Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:

* is also known as hydroxl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
* contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
* may cause severe burns.
* contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
* accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
* may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
* has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.


Contamination is reaching epidemic proportions!

Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. DHMO has caused millions of dollars of property damage in the midwest, and recently California.

Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:

* as an industrial solvent and coolant.
* in nuclear power plants.
* in the production of styrofoam.
* as a fire retardant.
* in many forms of cruel animal research.
* in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
* as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.


Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!

The American government has refused to ban the production, distribution, or use of this damaging chemical due to its "importance to the economic health of this nation." In fact, the navy and other military organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations. Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a highly sophisticated underground distribution network. Many store large quantities for later use.


I readily admit that The Globex Corporation is involved in the DHMO conspiracy. I currently possess DHMO in both its liquid and solid forms, though I suspect that some has escaped containment and the gaseous form is most likely present at the worldwide headquarters of The Globex Corporation. I feel that it's my duty to let you, fine readers, know of the dangers of this insidious substance. The government may be turning a blind eye to the problem, but I feel that it's my duty to get the word out while I still have time.

For more information about the dangers of DHMO, follow this link.

Better yet, check out this site for the straight scoop.


BOJ

 
goatgraph
As usual, charts and graphs presented on The Globex Corporation Newsletter are not substatiated by any polling data or scientific fact. They do contain pretty colors though, and in the end, isn't that what really matters?

Sadly, no.

For topical use only. Discontinue use if side effects, indluding rash and blindness persist for more than 24 hours.

BOJ

 

My Three Sons of Pointless Shit

BACKSTREET BOYS LYRICS

I Want It That Way

Yeah

You are my fire
The one desire
Believe when I say
I want it that way

But we are two worlds apart
Can't reach to your heart
When you say
That I want it that way

[Chorus:]
Tell me why
Ain't nothin' but a heartache
Tell me why
Ain't nothin' but a mistake
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way

Am I your fire
Your one desire
Yes I know it's too late
But I want it that way

[Chorus]

Now I can see that we're falling apart
From the way that it used to be, yeah
No matter the distance
I want you to know
That deep down inside of me...

You are my fire
The one desire
You are
You are, you are, you are

Don't wanna hear you say
Ain't nothin' but a heartache
Ain't nothin' but a mistake
(Don't wanna hear you say)
I never wanna hear you say
I want it that way

Tell me why
Ain't nothin' but a heartache
Tell me why
Ain't nothin but a mistake
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
(Don't wanna hear you say it)
I want it that way
I want it that way



BACKSTREET BOYS
I Want it That Way
(Him I want that way)
translated into Greek
then back into English


Yes

You are my fire
this wish it considers when I say
him wants that way

But is two worlds
cannot villages reach in your heart
when you say that
him I want that way

[ Choruses: ]
to Me you fall
because Ain't nothin "but heartache to me says
because Ain't nothin" but a error to me says
because the wanna I do not hear never
that you say him I want that way

Is I your fire
your wish yes knows
is too much late
but him wants that way

[ Choruses ]
Now I can see that we fall apart
from the way that it was, yes subject
No the distance that you
I want in order to I deeply know this under my interior...

You are my fire
this wish that is you is,
is, is wanna does not hear you say
Ain't nothin "but a heartache
Ain't nothin" but a error
(wanna it does not hear you it says)
wanna I does not hear never that you say
him I want that way

to Me you fall because
Ain't nothin "but heartache
to me says because Ain't nothin but a error
to me says because the wanna I do not hear
do not say
(wanna it does not hear you him it says)
him want that way
him I want that way




Translation done with Alta Vista's Babel Fish.

I think that it's interesting that all of the pronouns defaulted to masculine, then again I'm translating to and from Greek and it is by Backstreet Boys.

Unless anyone has any huge objections, I'm gonna leave Babel Fish alone for a while. Still this was pretty pointless.....

BOJ

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

 
avgattitude

Mega-Bitch Wednesday. Seems like I had more wild attitude swings than that, but the scientific data doesn't lie.

BOJ

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

 

Fun With Babel Fish

I'm having so much fun using Babel Fish for other than it's intended purpose. Here are a few songs I've written, translated into German and then back into English:

you ask me whether I love you,
I cannot straight say
that in the truth I love you more and more ask you with each ueberschreitenen day, which kind of the girl I like I think that the level of the answer is,
to my kind of favourite to see lyin ', that near me here

is quite you asks me, my opinion of the color of its hair
it straight does not mean that much to me,
whom truth says, which I do not interest straight me,
if she comes to the color of your hair I permits it not meant that much
my favourite is the color, you have

Just or curly, long or briefly,
release flowin ', or under hat
means it real much not to me,
hang my love straight not of off it height is,
I believe, if I am with you and the low, if we are not it the way are separate,
which you look, it are, what you have within your heart

you to say that you have a straight further question,
then, which you send me on my way,
you to ask, which kind of boobs I may surprise you ` period it each day well,
the small am nice and the large I white, always inside demand are,
but are my kind of favourite the that're in my hand

But I like your sister, also






Chamagne by the fire-place
I have the music on the material low shade,
which ` to cross the living person dances area in their warm hypnotic glowing,
which I set up it so perfectly to I hope, these is, not where it terminates,
but I think, this night, which goes, the night for being
I straight wish that I could explain to my friends


I played it out all in my understanding for, therefore you long
yourselves and I have each small thing, which could go wrongly,
but the night this night, which I will finally give him a Whirl
and something hope day of the I regarded to try this with a real girl

Do not have much luck with women,
whom I think, who am to see really clear,
therefore am a romantic evening it am only my right hand and I
may incompletely alone, but I always try to do up it to right
each time I the term have
and my right hand precipitate never please to
at least `, until I run from lotion






All day long carry I two
all day long, carry I two
all day long, which I two condoms carry,
because their virtue
then I whip away and believe as savage man untrue is

if I am not with you knowledge you, where you were,
or which diseases you have
me straight, to see, and you me me hot
so all day long carry two condoms
form your body for baby,
because you whip viture then I away and believe like a savage man untrue is,

if I am with you you alway explain me, baby
am it a stupid habit fairly that we not at the grocer's shop memory are
and I not bags to double must it,
but favourite your express way in a terrible confusion is
and I does not think the fact that you know,
carry the meaning of fourteen individual parts or of smaller

so all day long I two
all day long, carry I two,
all day long, which I carry two condoms,
because then I whip your virtue away
and believes like a savage man untrue is, if I am with you


Do it yourself! It's fun!

BOJ

 

Learn a Foreign Language

Alta Vista has a really cool service called Babel Fish that will translate a block of text into a language of your choice. I studied some German and Latin in High School and College, and one of the things I learned was that no matter how smart technology becomes, it will never be able to completely capture the original tone in any translation.

Simply put, one word does not
necessarily equal another in another language. There is simply no way technology can make the right choice of vocabulary based on context. Babel Fish obviously doesn't look at context, it just translates literally, and applies some simple grammar rules.

I am not down on Babel Fish. I use it quite a bit. Since I don't have the opportunity to speak much German in my everyday life, I use Babel Fish to fill in some of the vocab holes that I have. It's a really useful tool, for translating a word or phrase. Beyond that it can be somewhat comical.

No, I'm positive about teaching foreign languages. Even though I don't use the German I learned very much, learning it made me more concious of how English is put together. It also gave me a tiny bit of insight into another culture and made me realize that my own culture doesn't always handle things the best way. Neither does German culture, for that matter, but it was good for me to get that sort of insight.

Learn a foreign language, but don't just learn it as a skill. Yes, understanding Spanish is proving to be a good skill to have in the workforce, but take everything from it. Take the little bit of insight into another culture that you get from it.

The following, from my post "A Day Without Immigrants" has been translated from English into Spanish and then back to English using Babel Fish. Something is definitly lost in the translation.....


The illegal immigrants and their those in favor are demonstration, protests, and boycottings of the parking today. The aim of the boycottings is to demonstrate to the rest of us "not-immigrants" how much we needed illegals. How much they add to our society doing the works we them "not-immigrants" do not wish to do. How much they add to our economy buying merchandise and services. Illegals is trying to demonstrate to us how much we needed them carrying out a "day without the immigrants.

I wonder myself what American native thinks of this. To a native American, I am an immigrant. My family has both been in this country for all the last century plus the small very small small pieces of centuries that surrounded it. My family placed mainly in small cities in Illinois, Iowa and Dakota of the South. The cities that, above until of World War II you could have obtained not speaking anything but German in some of these cities. You could make commerce and practice your religion in German. During World War II the class of the government of the E.E.U.U. to end that one. No came in churches you would lutheran and they did not demand that the services are only carried out in English, but animated to congregations that carried out only services in the Earth language. Some services German continued in years 50 in some cities, but the language was weeded generally of populacho by then.

Today as I watch the Cnn, I see people protesting of the laws of this country whereas it takes the flag of another country of soverign. I am obtaining class of a message mixed here. Some of the flags are printed in a language that does not understand. I am everything to allow that people speak the language of her inheritance, I I wish only our government had not prohibited to my family the same courtesy.

In this "day without the immigrants" they remember to me that my family was immigrants. It undertook great difficulty to come to this country, although they left rough economic conditions in the country, were not no there guarentees in the United States. But he jumped with all the appropriate hoops, let the government know it was here, entered a where and to when the government said to him. In many cases lived in earth the government he said to him that they could live ignition. They, and another one of level northern Europe placed nothern.

What we have today is not a "day without the immigrants." We must call this day which really is, "a day without the illegal immigrants." The protest, goes next and protests, but if Migra ' demonstrates for above in its protest, you do not have any right to complain when they send to him again to you you came wherever. There are legal ways to obtain in this country. Hell, I worked with a handful of them in SoCal. Some of them worked here in visas, others asked for and received citizenship. They made our country a more interesting place, as soon as as a German handful goofy did on a century ago.

This country will always have immigrants. They offend something that certain group of them has decided to demonstrate them to which he would be like without them. My ancestors never decided to try to demonstrate the rest of the country what things would be like without them. Then again, too much they were occupied placing the central portions of this country.

BOXWOOD

Apparently BOJ is BOXWOOD en Espanol. If that's not reason enough to actually learn a foreign language, I don't know what is.

BOXWOOD

Monday, May 08, 2006

 

A Car?

I've spent the last two weeks without a car. Cheyenne is a relatively small place and there is a city bus, but I'm far away from everything (except the AFB) and I work untraditional hours. What's a guy to do?

Neighbor Tim works the same shift as I do. The supervisor at work was good enough to let me change my hours temporarily to match Tim's so I could ride with him. It meant working 4 ten hour days a week which had it's advantages. It had it's disadvantages too, like trying to find something to do for those extra two hours. I did learn a lot back in the library over this period, so the time wasn't a total waste.

I started running a little short of groceries last week. Mostly perishables like produce. I didn't come close to starving, of course, but I had to get a little creative in my meal planning. Came up with a really good one yesterday, so things seem to be working out OK.

Dad's coming down with a trailer today to take the car back to the SD (he actually lives just outside of the RC). He's bringing a car down so I should have something to drive around for a while.

I'm constantly amazed at how people look out for me. I could be stranded in my apartment, but my neighbor's been driving me to work, my supervisor gave me no hassles about changing my hours temporarily. My dad got up at a ridiculous hour this morning to hit the road. People are bending over backward for me and I certainly appreciate it.

Tim's having trouble with his alternator so this past week has been an adventure for both of us trying to get to work. I'll help him out as much as possible. I'll give him a ride to work today if at all possible. We're all in this together, I guess.....

BOJ

Friday, May 05, 2006

 

Soul Patch Dispensation

soulpatch

I picked up this form at the capital as well. I was thinking of going this way, but the artist's rendering was at the applicant's expense.

Screw that!

BOJ

 

Where the Action Is

french
Cover of Sue's 2003 WC Handy Award winning
album Where the Action Is
Where the Action Is is a fantastic Sue Foley album. I suggest you check it out.

There are plenty of fine originals on the album, but a stand out track, to me anyway, is a cover of The Stones' Stupid Girl. I've always enjoyed what happens when a song is done by someone of another gender. Stupid Girl has a really catty feel when done by a woman. I like Sue's treatment better than the original.

Another favorite singer, Holly Cole, has made something of a career singing songs originally done by male artists. Her 1995 album Temptation is entirely covers of Tom Waits material. I love Tom Waits, but hearing a sweet voiced female interpret his lyrics is a real treat and gives the songs a really different feel.

She's also pretty attractive in a quirky art student sort of way. Then again, I once married one of those, so you see where I'm coming from.

I have no plans for a Holly Cole Photo Saturday.......


BOJ

Thursday, May 04, 2006

 
facialhair

You should see the form I have to fill out every time I get a haircut.....

BOJ

 

Another Gem from The Onion

french
Mike, I am NOT responsible for this photo.....
I'm trying not to be quite so needy, so today I'm not going to beg you to check out The Onion, I'm going to ask nicely. See, isn't that better?

So the following is an excerpt from an Onion article:



Wig-Wearing Mike Tyson Retires From Foxy-Boxing

"It's time," said Tyson, still unstable on his four-inch stiletto heels after the hard uppercut from Gilchrist that knocked off not only his trademark tiara, but also both of his gold hoop earrings. "I think I should hang it up now while I still have my health, my looks, and a very, very tiny shred of self-respect."


Too late, Mike.

In all seriousness, Mike Tyson is the greatest heavywight boxer I ever saw. He wasn't just a one trick pony with awesome power, he was a great defensive fighter and as technically proficient of a fighter as I've ever seen. All of the outrageeous things that he was involved in completely overshadowed what a great fighter he was. Too bad he'll likely go down in history as a freakshow.

Freakshows sell tickets, though, and as broke as he is, I'm sure we'll be able to see him wrestle bears or get shot out of a cannon on Pay-per-View in the near future.

BOJ

Labels:


 

The Illegitimate Son of Pointless Shit

It's information you simply can't live without...


33rd Annual Daytime Emmy Awards Winners


Outstanding Drama Series Directing Team


GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC
OWEN RENFROE, DIRECTOR
WILLIAM LUDEL, DIRECTOR
JOSEPH BEHAR, DIRECTOR
SCOTT MCKINSEY, DIRECTOR
MATTHEW DIAMOND, DIRECTOR
CHRISTINE MAGARIAN, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
RONALD CATES, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
PENNY PENGRA, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
PETER FILLMORE, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
R.C. CATES, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
DAVE MCLEOD, ASSOCIATE DIRECTOR
CRYSTAL KRAFT, STAGE MANAGER
CRAIG MCMANUS, STAGE MANAGER

Outstanding Achievment, over-acting In A Drama Series, female

GUIDING LIGHT * CBS
KIM ZIMMER, AS "SKANKY" MCGEE

Outstanding Achievment, over-acting In A Drama Series, male

GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC
ANTHONY GEARY, AS TURD FERGUESON

Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Drama Series

GUIDING LIGHT * CBS
GINA TOGNONI, AS DINAH MARLER

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama Series

GUIDING LIGHT * CBS
JORDAN CLARKE, AS BILLY LEWIS

Outstanding Younger Actress In A Drama Series

AS THE WORLD TURNS * CBS
JENNIFER LANDON, AS GWEN NORBECK

Outstanding Younger Actor In A Drama Series

GUIDING LIGHT * CBS
TOM PELPHREY, AS JONATHAN RANDALL

Best Casting Couch, Daytime Drama

WILLIAM LUDEL'S SOFA-BED, GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC

Outstanding Game Show Host

JEOPARDY! * SYN
ALEX TREBEK - GOD-LIKE IN HIS FRENCH PRONOUNCIATIONS, HOST


Outstanding Talk Show Host
ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
ELLEN DEGENERES, HOST

Outstanding Service Show Host

SUZE ORMAN: FOR THE YOUNG,
FABULOUS & BROKE * PBS
SUZE ORMAN, HOST

Outstanding daytime waste of time

GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC
JILL FARREN PHELPS, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
MARY O'LEARY, PRODUCER
MERCER BARROWS, PRODUCER
MICHELLE HENRY, PRODUCER
DEBORAH GENOVESE, COORDINATING PRODUCER
ROBERT GUZA, JR., CONSULTING PRODUCER
CHARLES PRATT, JR., CONSULTING PRODUCER

Outstanding Pre-School Children's Series

BARNEY'S HITCH HIKING TIPS FOR KIDS * PBS
LEWIS BERNSTEIN, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
KEVIN CLASH, CO-EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
CAROL-LYNN PARENTE, SENIOR PRODUCER
KAREN IALACCI, COORDINATING PRODUCER
MELISSA DINO, PRODUCER
TIM CARTER, CO-PRODUCER

Outstanding Gab Fest

ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
ELLEN DEGENERES, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
ELLEN DEGENERES' LESBIAN LOVER, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
ED GLAVIN, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
ANDY LASSNER, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
MIKE GIBBONS, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
DEREK WESTERVELT, COORDINATING PRODUCER
JASON GABEL, SENIOR PRODUCER
MELISSA GEIGER SCHRIFT, SENIOR PRODUCER
JONATHAN NORMAN, SENIOR PRODUCER
CHRISTINE SCHOMER, PRODUCER
KAREN KILGARIFF, PRODUCER
LORI BLACKMAN, PRODUCER
BRADFORD BRILLOWSKI, PRODUCER
MELISSA COSTELLO, PRODUCER
KAREN ANDERSON, PRODUCER
DANNY BREEN, PRODUCER
MARGARET SMITH, PRODUCER
ALISON BALIAN, PRODUCER
DANNY CEBALLOS, PRODUCER
LIZ FELDMAN, PRODUCER
JILL KUSHNER, PRODUCER
DEREK CHE, PRODUCER
GREG FITZSIMMONS, PRODUCER

Outstanding Special Class Series

TALES OF THE "SHORT BUS" * TLC
TERRI JOHNSON, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
PAUL DON VITO, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
STEVEN WEINSTOCK, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
GLENDA HERSH, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
NIKKI TAUB, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
LIZ LAYTON, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
LORRI LEIGHTON, SENIOR PRODUCER
CHRISTINA MARRA MCELROY, PRODUCER
CONSUELO VILLANUEVA, PRODUCER
SADYE WHITE, PRODUCER
LIZA GANGI HEISKELL, PRODUCER
NIKKI BORRELLI, LINE PRODUCER

Outstanding Drama Series Writing Team (grammar and syntax)

THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS * CBS
KAY ALDEN, HEAD WRITER
JOHN F. SMITH, HEAD WRITER
JIM HOUGHTON, WRITER
NATALIE MINARDI SLATER, WRITER
SALLY SUSSMAN MORINA, WRITER
SARA A. BIBEL, WRITER
JANICE FERRI, WRITER
ERIC FREIWALD, WRITER
LINDA SCHREIBER, WRITER
JOSHUA S. MCCAFFREY, WRITER
MARC HERTZ, WRITER
SANDRA WEINTRAUB, WRITER

33rd Annual Daytime Emmy Awards Winners in the Creative Arts Categories
announced April 22, 2006


Outstanding Children's Animated Program


JAKERS! THE ADVENTURES OF PIGGLEY WINKS * PBS
MIKE YOUNG, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
STEPHANIE GOUGEON, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
LOUISA STRETTON, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
BILL SCHULTZ, CO-EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
LIZ YOUNG, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
CARY SILVER, LINE PRODUCER
JOHN OVER, PRODUCER/DIRECTOR
KELLY WARD, DIRECTOR
SINDY MCKAY, HEAD WRITER
LARRY SWERDLOVE, WRITER
DENNIS HALEY, WRITER
MARCY BROWN, WRITER
JENNIFER YALE, WRITER
PETER GARCIA, WRITER
PAMELA HICKEY, WRITER
DENNYS MCCOY, WRITER

Outstanding Special Class Animated Program

THE BATMAN * KIDS WB!
BRUCE WAYNE, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
DICK GRAYSON, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
ALFRED THE BUTLER, SUPERVISING PRODUCER/STORY EDITOR
COMMISSIONER GORDON, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
MR. FREEZE, PRODUCER
FRANK GORSHIN AS "THE RIDDLER", PRODUCER
BURGESS AS "THE PENGUIN", PRODUCER
ANONYMOUS KOREAN ANNIMATOR, DIRECTOR
BRANDON VIETTI, DIRECTOR
SAM LIU, DIRECTOR
GINNY MCSWAIN, DIRECTOR

Outstanding Achievement in Art Direction/Set Decoration/Scenic Design

MARTHA * SYN
JIM FENHAGEN, PRODUCTION DESIGNER
JOHN CASEY, PRODUCTION DESIGNER
ANDUIN HAVENS, ART DIRECTOR
PAM PETERSON, ART DIRECTOR
TAMARA DILWORTH, SET DECORATOR
AARON CARAMANIS, SET DECORATOR
MOLLY MAGUIRE, SET DECORATOR
JIM GARDNER, SET DECORATOR

Outstanding Achievment in Mean-Spirited Songs about Martha Stewart

"BLIND ORANGE" JULIUS * SYN


Outstanding Achievment in Series designed to desensitize kids to TV advertising

SESAME STREET * PBS
VICTOR DINAPOLI, PRODUCTION DESIGNER
LYNDON MOSSE, ART DIRECTOR
MIKE PANTUSO, ART DIRECTOR
PETE ORTIZ, ART DIRECTOR
NAT MONGIOI, SET DECORATOR

Outstanding Achievement in Art Direction/Set Decoration/Scenic Design For A Drama Series (PORN DIVISION)

AS THE WORLD TURNS * CBS
PATRICK HOWE, PRODUCTION DESIGNER
TIM GOODMANSON, ART DIRECTOR
DENNIS DONEGAN, SET DECORATOR
CATHERINE MCKENNEY, SET DECORATOR
KAREN HLIPALA, SET DECORATOR

Outstanding Achievement for a Casting Director For A Drama Series

GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC
MARK TESCHNER, CASTING DIRECTOR

Outstanding Achievement in Single Camera Photography (Film or Electronic)

THE VICTORY GARDEN * PBS
JOEL COBLENZ, DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY

Outstanding Achievement in Costume Design/Styling (Lederhosen division)

SESAME STREET * PBS
BILL KELLARD, COSTUME DESIGNER/LIVE ACTORS
TERRY ROBERSON, COSTUME DESIGNER/LIVE ACTORS
VICTORIA ELLIS, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
ROLLIN KREWSON, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
SARAH LURASCHI, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
CONNIE PETERSON, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
JASON WEBER, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
MICHELLE HICKEY, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
ANDREA DETWILER, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
POLLY SMITH, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
JANE PIEN, COSTUME DESIGNER/MUPPETS
Outstanding Achievement in

Costume Design For A Drama Series (Dressing Women like Harlots Division)

THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL * CBS
BIRGIT MULLER, COSTUME DESIGNER

Outstanding Directing In A Talk Show

ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
SOME MONKEY WITH A "VIDEO TOASTER", DIRECTOR

Outstanding Directing In A Service Show

EASY ENTERTAINING WITH MICHAEL CHIARELLO * FOOD
THE SAME MONKEY WHO DIRECTS "ELLEN", DIRECTOR

Outstanding Directing In A Children's Series

ZOOM * PBS
A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MONKEY, DIRECTOR

Outstanding Special Class Directing

79TH ANNUAL MACY'S THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE AND HINDENBURG-ESQUE BALLOON EXPLOSION * NBC
GARY HALVORSON, DIRECTOR

Outstanding Achievement in Single Camera Editing

STARTING OVER * SYN
LEELLEN PATCHEN, EDITOR
STEVEN URRUTIA, EDITOR
KAREN SNYDER, EDITOR
BARRY ZETLIN, EDITOR
PEGGY TACHDJIAN, EDITOR
RAOUL ROSENBERG, EDITOR
MARIA VITAKIS, EDITOR
AARON M. LEWIS, EDITOR
JOE SHUGART, EDITOR
MELISSA PUENTE, EDITOR
MAC CAUDILL, EDITOR
MARC GROSSMAN, EDITOR
AREK HOPE, EDITOR
STEVE MELLON, EDITOR
JAMES GAVIN BEDFORD, EDITOR

Outstanding Achievement in Multiple Camera Editing

SESAME STREET * PBS
ROBERT J. EMERICK, SUPERVISING EDITOR
SELBERN NARBY, EDITOR
JOHN TIERNEY, EDITOR
CHRIS REINHART, EDITOR

Outstanding Achievement in Multiple Camera Editing For A Drama Series

AS THE WORLD TURNS * CBS
ROBERT MACKLER, EDITOR
MATTHEW GRIFFIN, EDITOR

Outstanding Achievement in Hairstyling

THE TYRA BANKS SHOW * SYN
KIYAH WRIGHT, HAIRSTYLIST
THERESA BROADNAX, HAIRSTYLIST

Not that bitch Dierdre Stadtmaur of "The View"

Outstanding Achievement in Hairstyling For A Drama Series

GENERAL HOSPITAL * ABC
KIMBER L. ANDERSON, HEAD HAIRSTYLIST
JOE MATKE, HAIRSTYLIST
LINDA OSGOOD, HAIRSTYLIST
MICHAEL ANTON PROCKIW, HAIRSTYLIST
CURT S. DARLING, HAIRSTYLIST
ANZHELA ADZHIYAN, HAIRSTYLIST
JOANN ONORIO, HAIRSTYLIST

Outstanding Achievement in Lighting Direction (Laser Pointer Division)

THE OPRAH WINFREY SHOW * SYN
TARA DENISE, LIGHTING DIRECTOR
SEAN POST, LIGHTING DIRECTOR
Outstanding Achievement in

Lighting Direction For A Drama Series

AS THE WORLD TURNS * CBS
DONNA LARSON, LIGHTING DESIGNER
NICHOLAS VARACALLI, LIGHTING DESIGNER
THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL * CBS
RUDY HUNTER, LIGHTING DIRECTOR
LAURI MOORMAN, LIGHTING DIRECTOR

Outstanding Achievement in Main Title Design

ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
LYNDA KAHN, TITLE DESIGNER
ELLEN KAHN, TITLE DESIGNER
ANNE BABIN, TITLE DESIGNER
ALISA BENFEY, GRAPHIC ARTIST

Outstanding Achievement in Makeup (Preventing Barbara Walters from looking like a Zombie Division)

THE VIEW * ABC
EVE PEARL, MAKEUP ARTIST
REBECCA BORMAN, MAKEUP ARTIST
KAREN DUPICHE, MAKEUP ARTIST
ELENA GEORGE, MAKEUP ARTIST
LORI KLEIN, MAKEUP ARTIST

Outstanding Achievement in Makeup For A Drama Series (Slut and Whore Division)

THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS * CBS
PATRICIA DENNEY, KEY MAKEUP ARTIST
ROBERT BOLGER, MAKEUP ARTIST
KATHY JONES, MAKEUP ARTIST
TAIA RED, MAKEUP ARTIST
RALPH WILCOX, MAKEUP ARTIST

Outstanding Achievement in Music Direction And Composition

SESAME STREET * PBS
THAT GUY WHO DOES THE PRONO THEMES, MUSIC DIRECTOR
DAVE CONNER, MUSIC DIRECTOR
TONY GEISS, COMPOSER
DANNY EPSTEIN, COMPOSER

Outstanding Achievement in Music Direction And Composition For A Drama Series

THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS * CBS
MIKE DOBSON, MUSIC SUPERVISOR
JACK ALLOCCO, COMPOSER
DAVID KURTZ, COMPOSER

Outstanding Original Song

THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS * CBS
Song Title: Some Day We'll Have Real Jobs
MICHAEL KISUR, COMPOSER/LYRICIST
BRADLEY HATFIELD, COMPOSER

Outstanding Performer In A Children's Series

SESAME STREET * PBS
KEVIN " MR ANNOYING" CLASH AS ELMO

Outstanding Performer In A Children/Youth/Family Special

EDGE OF AMERICA * SHO
JAMES MCDANIEL AS HUGH G. RECTION

Outstanding Performer In An Animated Program

JAKERS! THE ADVENTURES OF PIGGLEY
WINKS * PBS
MAILE FLANAGAN AS PIGGLEY WINKS

Outstanding Game / Audience Participation Show

JEOPARDY! - THE GREATEST SHOW IN THE HISTORY OF TELEVISION * SYN
HARRY FRIEDMAN, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER/WRITER
LISA FINNERAN, SENIOR PRODUCER
ROCKY SCHMIDT, SENIOR PRODUCER
GARY JOHNSON, SENIOR PRODUCER/WRITER
KEVIN MCCARTHY, DIRECTOR
"BLIND ORANGE" JULIUS, SEASON 20 CONTESTANT
JOHN DUARTE, WRITER
KATHY EASTERLING, WRITER
MARK GABERMAN, WRITER
DEBBIE GRIFFIN, WRITER
MICHELE LOUD, WRITER
ANDREW SHEPARD PRICE, WRITER
JIM RHINE, WRITER
STEVE D. TAMERIUS, WRITER
BILLY WISSE, WRITER


Outstanding Children's Series

ZOOM * PBS
KATE TAYLOR, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
KATHLEEN SHUGRUE, SENIOR PRODUCER
PAUL SERAFINI, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
MARCY GUNTHER, COORDINATING PRODUCER
MARISA WOLSKY, PRODUCER

Outstanding Children/Youth/Family Special

REALITY MATTERS: TEEN SEXUALITY, ALWAYS WEAR TWO CONDOMS * DSC HLTH
STACEY DEWITT, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
COLLIN SIEDOR, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER/WRITER
CLARE ROY, PRODUCER
KAREN SAVAGE, PRODUCER/WRITER

Outstanding Service Show

30 MINUTE MEALS WITH RACHAEL RAY * FOOD
BOB TUSCHMAN, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
MARK DISSIN, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER

Outstanding Special Class Special

2005 WALT DISNEY WORLD CHRISTMAS DAY PARADE FEATURING THE FROZEN HEAD OF WALT DISNEY * ABC
ANDREW PERROTT, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
JEFF PALMER, SUPERVISING PRODUCER
JOHN BEST, COORDINATING PRODUCER
PHILIP HACK, LINE PRODUCER
DARLENE PAPALINI, PRODUCER
KEVIN YOUNG, PRODUCER
GINA D. JONES, PRODUCER
RHONDA PARKER, PRODUCER
REGIS PHILBIN, CO-HOST
KELLY RIPA, CO-HOST
RYAN SEACREST, CO-HOST

Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing - Live Action and Animation

THE BATMAN * KIDS WB!
THOMAS SYSLO, SUPERVISING SOUND EDITOR
TIMOTHY BORQUEZ, M.P.S.E., SUPERVISING SOUND EDITOR
KEITH DICKENS, SOUND EDITOR
ERIK FOREMAN, SOUND EDITOR
JEFF HUTCHINS, SOUND EDITOR
DANIEL BENSHIMON, SOUND EDITOR
DOUG ANDORKA, SOUND EDITOR
ERIC FREEMAN, SOUND EDITOR
MARK KEATTS, SUPERVISING DIALOGUE/ADR EDITOR
MICHAEL GARCIA, DIALOGUE/ADR EDITOR
MARK KEEFER, DIALOGUE/ADR EDITOR
CHARLES SMITH, DIALOGUE/ADR EDITOR
MARK HOWLETT, SOUND EDITOR
Outstanding Achievement in Live &

Direct To Tape Sound Mixing

ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
TERRY FOUNTAIN, PRODUCTION MIXER
BILLY SHERRY, SOUND EFFECTS MIXER

Outstanding Achievement in Live & Direct To Tape Sound Mixing For A Drama Series

PASSIONS * NBC
BRUCE BOTTONE, PRODUCTION MIXER
ANTHONY DALFERES, PRODUCTION MIXER
WALTER NEW, RE-RECORDING MIXER
DANIEL BOSWORTH, RE-RECORDING MIXER
RICARDO ALVAREZ, BOOM OPERATOR
GREG FERRARA, BOOM OPERATOR
CAROL SILVERMAN, BOOM OPERATOR
AL TADDEO, BOOM OPERATOR

Outstanding Achievement in Sound Mixing - Live Action and Animation

SESAME STREET * PBS
BLAKE NORTON, PRODCUTION MIXER
BOB SCHOTT, RE-RECORDING MIXER
JIM CZAK, RE-RECORDING MIXER
DICK MAITLAND, RE-RECORDING MIXER

Outstanding Achievement in Technical Direction/Electronic Camera/Video Control (Making Oprah look somewhat human Division)

THE OPRAH WINFREY SHOW * SYN
ANNETTE DESHOTELS, TECHNICAL DIRECTOR
PATRICK RONDOU, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
RICHARD MORT, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
JOHN DICKINSON, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
JOE PAUSBACK, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
MARC CLAUSSEN, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
MICHAEL MAIER, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
JAMEL WARE, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
MICHAEL FREHE, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
MARTY MUZIK, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
WYNN GRIFFITHS, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
MIKE CLAY, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
CLARK GRAY, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
TOMMI SKINNER, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
WADE BOBBITT, SENIOR VIDEO
ROY OTAKE, VIDEO CONTROL

Outstanding Achievement in Technical Direction/Electronic Camera/
Video Control/Vertical Hold For A Drama Series


THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS * CBS
TRACY LAWRENCE, TECHNICAL DIRECTOR
JOHN BROMBEREK, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
LUIS GODINEZ, JR., ELECTRONIC CAMERA
KAI KIM, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
DEAN LAMONT, ELECTRONIC CAMERA
ROBERT BOSIO, SENIOR VIDEO
SCHA JANI, SENIOR VIDEO

Outstanding Writing In A Children's Series

SESAME STREET * PBS
LOU BERGER, HEAD WRITER
JUDY FREUDBERG, HEAD WRITER
JOEY MAZZARINO, WRITER
CHRISTINE FERRARO, WRITER
BELINDA WARD, WRITER
MOLLY BOYLAN, WRITER
ANNIE EVANS, WRITER
TONY GEISS, WRITER
LUIS SANTEIRO, WRITER
EMILY KINGSLEY, WRITER
JOHN WEIDMAN, WRITER

Outstanding Special Class Writing

ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW, THE * SYN
KAREN KILGARIFF, HEAD WRITER
KAREN ANDERSON, WRITER
DANNY BREEN, WRITER
MARGARET SMITH, WRITER
ALISON BALIAN, WRITER
DANNY CEBALLOS, WRITER
LIZ FELDMAN, WRITER
GREG FITZSIMMONS, WRITER
JILL KUSHNER, WRITER
ELLEN DEGENERES, WRITER

Outstanding Achievement in Truck Driving for Non-Traditional Delivery Platforms

ALLIED VAN LINES * AOL
VITO CORLEONE, TUTTI CAPO DE CAPI
JIM BANKOFF, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
KEVIN WALL, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
BILL WILSON, PRODUCER
MICHAEL WOLFSON, PRODUCER

There they are, your 2006 Daytime Emmy Award Winners. I'm so glad that bitch Dierdre Stadtmaur didn't win for hairstyling.

For the actual list, click here. I do work on the fringes of the same industry these people work in, so I guess it might someday pay to do something nice.....

BOJ

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

 

Another Graphic Mega-Bitch Wednesday

pod

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

 

This One's from "The Paper"

french
I probably need to improve the quality of the sites I visit.....
It's not quite a good as The Onion, but "The Paper" KICKS MAJOR ASS!!!!!!!

If it weren't for "The Paper", I'd know far less about Bat Boy and the aliens that seceretly control our government. No, "The Paper" is a goldmine of the knowledge I need to live my everyday life.

And this is a great example:

The secret to achieving sexual gratification through paper -- as with a lover -- is to handle it slowly, building the tension and then pressing down firmly to take control."

Origasmi is becoming so popular with young Japanese women that government officials are worried about a population fall-off.

"Young Japanese women are bored with Japanese guys who spend all their time working, playing video games or entertaining clients in karaoke bars," said a member of Japan's Ministry of Social Trends, who insisted upon anonymity.

"Now they're taking matters into their own hands."


I'm not sure if I really believe that Japanese women are turning to erotic paper folding for sexual gratification, but I completely accept that Japan has a Ministry of Social Trends. I also completely buy that Japanese men are too busy with Karaoke to engage in sexual congress. C'mon! It's addictive and if you spend one night at a bar where Karaoke is being practiced it's obvious to see that this activity will cause the downfall of society.

Like with anything I read, I take what I want and just leave the rest. Sort of like a literary salad bar.

BOJ

 

Read The Onion, Damn it!

cutler
The Onion. You know you want to read it.....
I beg, I plead, I do everything but take you by the hand and lead you there. Read The Onion damn it! I don't know how much more I can do.

Look, it's a hell of a lot funnier than this crap and there's far less grammatical errors. They can actually afford to pay people to check their grammar and spelling for them. What are you waiting for?

We now return you to the same old crap.

BOJ

Labels:


 

Positive about Jay Cutler

cutler
New Broncos QB Jay Cutler.
It's not very often that a team that played for a conference championship drafts a high profile QB in the first round. That's just what the Broncos have done, adding Vanderbilt QB, Jay Cutler with the tenth pick in this past weekend's NFL draft.

Like every team, the Broncos had needs. A quarterback wasn't nescessarily one of them, but Cutler was an intriguing pick. What it tells me is that the Broncos like the team that went to the AFC championship last year and saw little need to change what was a pretty good team. Rookie QB's don't start for playoff teams, so Cutler will sit behind incumbent QB Jake Plummer for at least a year.

Look out next year though. No one in Denver seems to really be sold on Plummer and the pick of Cutler isn't overly suprising. Cutler has a strong arm and had amazing workouts at the pre-draft combine. If he played any other position, he would probably be considered a strong candidate to start for his new team.

The thing I'm positive about is that the Broncos chose Jay Cutler, a player who most likely won't play for two or three years. It speaks volumes about their confidence for the upcoming season.

BOJ

Monday, May 01, 2006

 

"A Day Without Immigrants"

noburritos
From the BOJ News Service
Illegal immigrants and their supporters are staging demonstration, protests, and boycotts today. The aim of the boycotts are to show the rest of us "non-immigrants" how much we need the illegals. How much they add to our society by doing the jobs we "non-immigrants" don't want to do. How much they add to our economy by purchasing goods and services. The illegals are trying to show us how much we need them by staging a "Day Without Immigrants."


I wonder what native americans think about this. To a native american, I'm an immigrant. My family has been in this country for all of the past century plus little tiny bits of the two centuries surrounding it. My family settled in small towns primarily in Illinois, Iowa and South Dakota. Towns that, up until World War II you could have gotten by speaking nothing but German in some of these towns. You could do commerce and practice your religion in German. During World War II the US Government kind of put a stop to that. No they didn't come into Lutheran churches and demand that services only be held in English, but they encouraged congregations to only hold services in the language of the land. Some German services continued into the 1950's in some towns, but the language was generally weeded out of the populace by then.

Today as I watch CNN, I see people protesting the laws of this country while carrying the flag of another soverign country. I'm getting sort of a mixed message here. Some of the banners are printed in a language that I don't understand. I'm all for allowing people to speak the language of their heritage, I only wish our Government had allowed my family the same courtesy.

On this "Day Without Immigrants" I'm reminded that my family were immigrants. The undertook great hardship to come to this country, even though they were leaving rough economic conditions at home, there were no guarentees in the United States. But they jumped through all of the proper hoops, let the government know they were here, entered where and when the government told them to. In many cases lived on land the government told them they could live on. They, and others from northern Europe settled the nothern plains.

What we have today is not a "Day Without Immigrants." We should call this day what it really is, "A Day Without Illegal Immigrants." Protest, go ahead and protest, but if La Migra' shows up at your protest, you have no right to complain when you're shipped back to wherever you came from. There are legal ways to get into this country. Hell, I worked with a bunch of them in SoCal. Some of them worked here on visas, others applied for and received citizenship. They made our country a more interesting place, just like a bunch of goofy Germans did over a century ago.

This country will always have immigrants. I'm somewhat offended that a certain group of them have decided to show them what it would be like without them. My ancestors never decided to try to show the rest of the country what things would be like without them. Then again, they were too busy settling the central portions of this country.

BOJ

 

Gleemonex


Get this video and more at MySpace.com


See, I promised more video. Hadn't seen this one in a while. Someone let me know who that guy with the big ass belly is.

BOJ

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

The Bert Convey
Principle
Friends' Blogs
My Photo
Name:
Location: United States

I'm not telling you anything...

archives