Wednesday, September 30, 2009


Report: Dementia Risk Higher for (Former NFL) Players

Former NFL players have been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease or other memory-related conditions at rates much higher than the national population, according to a study commissioned by the league, The New York Times reported.

The survey found that 6.1 percent of players aged 50 and older reported that they had received a dementia-related diagnosis. That's five times higher than the cited national average of 1.2 percent, according to the report.

And players ages 30 through 49 reported dementia-related diagnoses at a rate of 1.9 percent -- 19 times the national average of 0.1 percent, according to the report.


So, more than 1 in 20 former NFL players has "Alzheimer's disease or other memory-related conditions."

Remember that on Sunday morning when Terry Bradshaw, Joe Theisman or Shannon Sharpe make predictions on the upcoming slate of NFL games.


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But, Marge! It works on any Ayatollah: Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, Ayatollah Zahedi...even as we speak, Ayatollah Razmada and his cadre of fanatics are consolidating their power.

Two Bad Neighbors


Tuesday, September 29, 2009


Fake Gambling - Week 4

    Colorado State at Idaho (+4) (Stations Line): $25

  • Oakland at Houston (-9.5): $25

  • Cincinnati (-5.5) at Cleveland: $25

  • Cincinnati at Cleveland UNDER (38.5): $25

  • Baltimore at New England UNDER (44.5): $25

  • St. Louis at San Francisco UNDER (38) (MGM/Mirage line): $25

  • Three Team Parlay (Pays 6/1) (MGM/Mirage lines): $10
    Cincinnati at Cleveland UNDER (38.5)
    Baltimore at New England UNDER (44.5)
    St. Louis at San Francisco UNDER (38)

  • Week 3 Stake: $685
    Week 3 Wagered: $160

    This week's NCAA Special is based almost entirely on spite, so expect bad karma to ruin this selection. I'm betting on good defense this week, looking for good performances by underrated D's (Cincinnati & San Francisco) in addition to Baltimore shutting down the Pat's overrated offense. Liked those three picks so much, I'm tying them together in a parlay as well.


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    So freak out if you wanna
    And I'll still be here
    Don't call me for years and when you do
    Yeah, I'll still be here

    I'm not saying the effort is a waste of time - but I
    Just love you for the things you couldn't change
    Though you've tried
    These hours of confusion they will soon expire
    Like everything

    Ben Folds
    "Learn to Live With What You Are"
    Sunny 16 (EP)


    Monday, September 28, 2009


    NFL Rankings - Week 3

    1. (1)New York Giants (3-0)
      Still #1

    2. (3)Minnesota Vikings (3-0)
      A quality win against the 'Niners

    3. (5)New York Jets (3-0)
      Another quality win

    4. (4)Philadelphia Eagles (2-1)
      Kolb is putting up nice numbers

    5. (6)Indianapolis Colts (3-0)
      Any team with Peyton Manning deserves to be on this list

    6. (7)San Diego Chargers (2-1)
      ...but second in the AFC West...

    7. (10)Baltimore Ravens (3-0)
      So they beat the Browns...

    8. (8)New England Patriots (2-1)
      Actually tried to run the ball this week

    9. (-)New Orleans Saints (3-0)
      Worst Defense in the Top 10

    10. (9)Atlanta Falcons (2-1)
      Still good, but beatable

    Out of Top 10: (2)Pittsburgh Steelers (1-2)

    Teams on the Rise: San Francisco 49ers (2-1), Denver Broncos (3-0), Cincinnati Bengals (2-1)

    ESPN NFL Power Rankings.
    Fox Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    CBS Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    NFL Network Fan and "Expert" NFL Power Rankings.
    NFL Standings


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    Sunday, September 27, 2009


    Fake Gambling Results - Week 3

    I got greedy. I knew the Lions would win outright today, but that wasn't enough for genius fake gamblin' boy. Oh no, I had to tie it to the over on the same game. Live and learn...

    I liked my NCAA special, and Tech led most of the game, which would have given me pretend money. Wins, however, are based on the final score. Curses!

    Peyton Manning comes through to keep the weekend from being disastrous...

    Texas Tech (+1) at Houston: PUSH

  • Jacksonville at Houston (-4): -$25

  • Chicago (-2) at Seattle: +$25

  • Pittsburgh (-4) at Cincinnati: -$50

  • Indianapolis (+2) at Arizona (Stations Line): +$25

  • Two Team Parlay (pays 13/5): -$15
    Washington at Detroit (+6.5) (Stations Line)
    Washington at Detroit OVER 38 (Stations Line)

  • Week 3 Against the Spread: 2-1-1
    Week 3 Over/Unders: 0-0
    Week 3 Parlays: 0-1

    Season Against the Spread: 5-8-1
    Season Over/Unders: 1-2
    Season Parlays: 0-1
    Balance for Week 1: -$40
    Total Amount Remaining: $685


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    Wednesday, September 23, 2009


    Hall of Fame Quarterbacks with Losing Records as Starters

    1. Sonny Jurgensen 69-73-7

    2. Joe Namath 62-63-4

    Others had very pedestrian starting records...



    Let me ask you a question. Why would a man whose shirt says "Genius at Work" spend all of his time watching a children's cartoon show?

    The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show


    Tuesday, September 22, 2009


    Fake Gambling - Week 3

    Lots of fun new stuff this week! I've made my first ever Fake Gambling NCAA pick and I couldn't be more excited about it! I'm using lots of exclamation points, so you know I'm excited!!!

    I've also added a two team parlay. In truth, I was set on taking the Lions this week no matter what, but getting 6.5 points seems like such a lock that I decided to parlay it with the over on the same game.

    Stay tuned and see how monumentally bad I am at this...

    Texas Tech (+1) at Houston: $25

  • Jacksonville at Houston (-4): $25

  • Chicago (-2) at Seattle: $25

  • Pittsburgh (-4) at Cincinnati: $50

  • Indianapolis (+2) at Arizona (Stations Line): $25

  • Two Team Parlay (pays 13/5): $15
    Washington at Detroit (+6.5) (Stations Line)
    Washington at Detroit OVER 38 (Stations Line)

  • Week 3 Stake: $725
    Week 3 Wagered: $165


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    A tisket, a tasket
    My nuts, my nards, my basket
    Step into the shower I squat and prance
    Like a sumo wrestler with no pants
    Like the hydraulics on my lowrider
    Freeballin' in John Denver's glider
    Pound for pound, ounce for ounce
    Great God, I love it when they bounce



    Monday, September 21, 2009


    NFL Rankings - Week 2

    1. (5)New York Giants (2-0)
      A new #1

    2. (1)Pittsburgh Steelers (1-1)
      That's a loss I didn't see coming

    3. (7)Minnesota Vikings (2-0)
      You can only gain so much by beating the Lions...

    4. (2)Philadelphia Eagles (1-1)
      Obviously this team is better with McNabb

    5. (10)New York Jets (2-0)
      Talked the talk, walked the walk

    6. (6)Indianapolis Colts (2-0)
      Can win games with less than 15 minutes time of possession

    7. (4)San Diego Chargers (1-1)
      Lost to a quality opponet

    8. (3)New England Patriots (1-1)
      So all you have to do is believe you can beat the Pats?

    9. (9)Atlanta Falcons (2-0)
      Apparently, last year was for real

    10. (-)Baltimore Ravens (2-0)
      They've decided to play some offense this year

    Out of Top 10: (8)Tennessee Titans (0-2)

    Teams on the Rise: New Orleans Saints (2-0), San Francisco 49ers (2-0)

    ESPN NFL Power Rankings.
    Fox Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    CBS Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    NFL Standings


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    Sunday, September 20, 2009


    Fake Gambling Results - Week 2

    Dear God, I have no idea what I'm doing...

    Although I do have a talent for picking underdogs. Maybe next week I'll just pick 'dogs.

  • Oakland (+3) over Kansas City: +$25

  • New England at New York Jets OVER (46): -$50

  • Greeen Bay (-9) over Cincinnati: -$50

  • Philadelphia (Pick 'em) over New Orleans (Stations Line): -$25

  • Washington (-9.5) over St. Louis (MGM/Mirage Line): -$25

  • New York Giants (+3) over Dallas: +$50

  • Pittsburgh (-3) over Chicago: -$50

  • Week 2 Against the Spread: 2-4
    Week 2 Over/Unders: 0-1

    Season Against the Spread: 3-7
    Season Over/Unders: 1-2
    Balance for Week 1: -$125
    Total Amount Remaining: $725


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    Thursday, September 17, 2009


    More Fake Gambling - Week 2

    Yesterday, I made the following picks:

  • Oakland (+3) over Kansas City: $25

  • New England at New York Jets OVER (46): $50

  • Greeen Bay (-9) over Cincinnati: $50

  • Philadelphia (Pick 'em) over New Orleans (Stations Line): $25

  • Washington (-9.5) over St. Louis (MGM/Mirage Line): $25

  • New York Giants (+3) over Dallas: $50

  • I meant to make the following clip as well:

  • Pittsburgh (-3) over Chicago: $50

  • I truly meant to make this pick, but "stupid fingers" (mine) deleted it. I just checked the line and it is the same as when I picked yesterday. That makes my totals:

    Week 2 Stake: $850
    Week 2 Wagered: $275


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    Wednesday, September 16, 2009


    Fake Gambling - Week 2

    For the first time in my gambling life (fake or otherwise), I'm betting on the Raiders. I could have sworn it was 1978 the way they played on Monday. As a football fan, it was good to see. As a realist, I'm skeptical.

    In the other notable pick, I like the Eagles over the Saints. It wasn't on most boards due to the uncertainty over the McNabb injury. I probably should have waited until McNabb was declared out, but I think the Eagles win this outright no matter who plays QB.

  • Oakland (+3) over Kansas City: $25

  • New England at New York Jets OVER (46): $50

  • Greeen Bay (-9) over Cincinnati: $50

  • Philadelphia (Pick 'em) over New Orleans (Stations Line): $25

  • Washington (-9.5) over St. Louis (MGM/Mirage Line): $25

  • New York Giants (+3) over Dallas: $50

  • Week 2 Stake: $850
    Week 2 Wagered: $225


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    In your face, space-coyote!!!

    El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Homer


    Tuesday, September 15, 2009


    Dr. Phil-ism Generator

    Start with:

    "You can't put a/an [rodent/odd animal] in a/an [specific clothing] and take it to [event/location befitting the previously entered specific clothing]!!!


  • "You can't put a lab rat in an evening gown and take it to the Prom!!!

  • "You can't put a kangaroo in a garter belt and take it to Niagra Falls for your Honeymoon!!!

  • "You can't put a hedgehog in an army uniform and take it to Normandy Beach!!!

  • Maybe finish up with something like "It just don't work!!!" and effect a bad 'Dr. Phil' accent. Be sure to be much louder than nescesary.

    Have fun with your own!


    Patrick Henry didn't say:
    "Give me liberty or give me a urine sample"
    Now did he!?!

    Mojo Nixon & Skid Roper
    "I Ain't Gonna Piss in No Jar"



    NFL Rankings - Week 1

    1. (1)Pittsburgh Steelers (1-0)
      An ugly win is still a win

    2. (6)Philadelphia Eagles (1-0)
      Looked good and the teams above them faltered against lesser competition

    3. (3)New England Patriots (1-0)
      Nearly a loss, this team has a lot to prove

    4. (2)San Diego Chargers (1-0)
      Struggled with the Raiders

    5. (4)New York Giants (1-0)
      Got surprisingly good play out of their WR's

    6. (5)Indianapolis Colts (1-0)
      Good enough

    7. (8)Minnesota Vikings (1-0)
      Their new QB looked OK

    8. (7)Tennessee Titans (0-1)
      A loss to #1 doesn't drop them out of the top 10

    9. (-)Atlanta Falcons (1-0)
      Beat last year's AFC East Champs

    10. (-)New York Jets (1-0)
      I'm not jumping on the bandwagon with both feet, but Sanchez looked good

    Out of Top 10: (9)Carolina Panthers (0-1), (10)Arizona Cardinals (0-1)

    ESPN NFL Power Rankings.
    Fox Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    CBS Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    NFL Standings


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    Fake Gambling Results - Week 1.1 least I didn't make things worse...

  • Buffalo at New England OVER (47): +$50

  • San Diego (-10.5) over Oakland: -$50

  • Week 1.1 Against the Spread: 0-1
    Week 1.1 Over/Unders: 1-0

    Although, in the interest of fake gambling integrity, I noticed a scoring error in previous results. Results for week 1 should have included:

  • Detroit (+13.5) over New Orleans (MGM/Mirage Line): -$50

  • These are the correct season results to date:

    Season Against the Spread: 1-3
    Season Over/Unders: 1-1
    Balance for Week 1: -$150
    Total Amount Remaining: $850


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    Monday, September 14, 2009


    Fake Gambling - Week 1.1
    I'm Not Compulsive, But...

    As always, I reserve the right to make additional fake wagers as I see fit...

  • Buffalo at New England OVER (47): $50

  • San Diego (-10.5) over Oakland: $50

  • Week 1.1 Stake: $950
    Week 1.1 Wagered: $100


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    Sunday, September 13, 2009


    Fake Gambling Results - Week 1

    Ugly game on Thursday night, and the Steelers don't cover. That's Fake Gambling.

    I thought the KC/Baltimore under was a lock, but the Ravens D let me down in fantasy as well. Somehow, I blame Brian Billick.

    The two winners don't quite offset the two losses...

  • Pittsburgh (-6) over Tennessee - (-$50)

  • Atlanta (-4) over Miami - (+$50)

  • Kansas City at Baltimore UNDER (36) - (-$100)

  • Detroit (+13.5) over New Orleans (MGM/Mirage Line) - (+$50)

  • Week 1 Against the Spread: 2-1
    Week 1 Over/Unders: 0-1

    Season Against the Spread: 2-1
    Season Over/Unders: 0-1
    Balance for Week 16: -$50
    Total Amount Remaining: $950



    Wednesday, September 09, 2009

    Oh cruel Fate! Why do you mock me?

    Bart the Daredevil


    Tuesday, September 08, 2009


    Fake Gambling Week 1

    A few years ago, I tried my hand at fake gambling. I've done some real and legal sports gambling in the past with moderate success. I've also done some real sports gambling of the other kind with even more success, but I was young and stupid. While fake gambling isn't real, it is legal. I'll stick with it for now.

    The rules? Pretty simple, really. I start with $1000, I guess they could be called "BOJ Bucks." I can bet any amount on as many games as I want. All bets are made against the spread. Lines are taken from The Caesars/Hilton line will be used, but, being a good shopper, I may use other lines. When this happens I will note it.

    Not being good at math, I will not calculate "juice," i.e. $100 bet will return $100. In my fake gambling world the bookie has to be happy with beating me (or not...). To start, at least, I won't be placing combination bets (parlays, doyles, teasers), it will just be single game bets including over/unders. I reserve the right to go all whacky, if I hear about an interesting proposition bet, I can bet it providing I find it listed on a legitimate betting site.

    Now that the boring rules are out of the way, let's make some fake picks!

  • Pittsburgh (-6) over Tennessee - $50

  • Atlanta (-4) over Miami - $50

  • Kansas City at Baltimore UNDER (36) - $100

  • Detroit (+13.5) over New Orleans (MGM/Mirage Line) - $50

  • Week 1 Stake: $1000
    Week 1 Wagered: $250


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    There were ghosts in the eyes
    Of all the boys you sent away
    They haunt this dusty beach road
    In the skeleton frames of burned out Chevrolets

    Bruce Springsteen
    "Thunder Road"
    Born to Run


    Monday, September 07, 2009

    The White House on Monday released the text of a controversial back-to-school speech to students from President Obama.

    Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield
    High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across
    America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today.

    I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in
    kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more year to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer, and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.

    I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to
    school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at
    4:30 in the morning.

    Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, "This is no picnic for me either, buster."
    So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school.

    But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year.

    Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about
    responsibility. I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn. I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox.

    I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards,
    supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve.

    But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it
    takes to succeed.

    And that’s what I want to focus on today: the responsibility each of you has for your
    education. I want to start with the responsibility you have to yourself.
    Every single one of you has something you’re good at. Every single one of you has
    something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that
    is. That’s the opportunity an education can provide.

    Maybe you could be a good writer – maybe even good enough to write a book or articles
    in a newspaper – but you might not know it until you write a paper for your English
    class. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor – maybe even good enough to
    come up with the next iPhone or a new medicine or vaccine – but you might not know it
    until you do a project for your science class. Maybe you could be a mayor or a Senator or a Supreme Court Justice, but you might not know that until you join student government or the debate team.

    And no matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an
    education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or a police officer? You want to be a nurse or an architect, a lawyer or a member of our military? You’re going to need a good education for every single one of those careers. You can’t drop out of school and just drop into a good job. You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it.

    And this isn’t just important for your own life and your own future. What you make of
    your education will decide nothing less than the future of this country. What you’re
    learning in school today will determine whether we as a nation can meet our greatest
    challenges in the future.

    You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills you learn in science and math to
    cure diseases like cancer and AIDS, and to develop new energy technologies and protect
    our environment. You’ll need the insights and critical thinking skills you gain in history and social studies to fight poverty and homelessness, crime and discrimination, and make our nation more fair and more free. You’ll need the creativity and ingenuity you develop in all your classes to build new companies that will create new jobs and boost our economy.

    We need every single one of you to develop your talents, skills and intellect so you can help solve our most difficult problems. If you don’t do that – if you quit on school – you’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on your country.

    Now I know it’s not always easy to do well in school. I know a lot of you have challenges in your lives right now that can make it hard to focus on your schoolwork.
    I get it. I know what that’s like. My father left my family when I was two years old, and I was raised by a single mother who struggled at times to pay the bills and wasn’t always able to give us things the other kids had. There were times when I missed having a father in my life. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in.

    So I wasn’t always as focused as I should have been. I did some things I’m not proud of, and got in more trouble than I should have. And my life could have easily taken a turn for the worse.

    But I was fortunate. I got a lot of second chances and had the opportunity to go to
    college, and law school, and follow my dreams. My wife, our First Lady Michelle
    Obama, has a similar story. Neither of her parents had gone to college, and they didn’t have much. But they worked hard, and she worked hard, so that she could go to the best schools in this country.

    Some of you might not have those advantages. Maybe you don’t have adults in your life
    who give you the support that you need. Maybe someone in your family has lost their job, and there’s not enough money to go around. Maybe you live in a neighborhood where
    you don’t feel safe, or have friends who are pressuring you to do things you know aren’t right.

    But at the end of the day, the circumstances of your life – what you look like, where you come from, how much money you have, what you’ve got going on at home – that’s no
    excuse for neglecting your homework or having a bad attitude. That’s no excuse for
    talking back to your teacher, or cutting class, or dropping out of school. That’s no excuse for not trying.

    Where you are right now doesn’t have to determine where you’ll end up. No one’s
    written your destiny for you. Here in America, you write your own destiny. You make
    your own future.

    That’s what young people like you are doing every day, all across America.
    Young people like Jazmin Perez, from Roma, Texas. Jazmin didn’t speak English when
    she first started school. Hardly anyone in her hometown went to college, and neither of her parents had gone either. But she worked hard, earned good grades, got a scholarship to Brown University, and is now in graduate school, studying public health, on her way to being Dr. Jazmin Perez.

    I’m thinking about Andoni Schultz, from Los Altos, California, who’s fought brain
    cancer since he was three. He’s endured all sorts of treatments and surgeries, one of
    which affected his memory, so it took him much longer – hundreds of extra hours – to do his schoolwork. But he never fell behind, and he’s headed to college this fall.

    And then there’s Shantell Steve, from my hometown of Chicago, Illinois. Even when
    bouncing from foster home to foster home in the toughest neighborhoods, she managed to
    get a job at a local health center; start a program to keep young people out of gangs; and she’s on track to graduate high school with honors and go on to college.

    Jazmin, Andoni and Shantell aren’t any different from any of you. They faced challenges in their lives just like you do. But they refused to give up. They chose to take responsibility for their education and set goals for themselves. And I expect all of you to do the same.

    That’s why today, I’m calling on each of you to set your own goals for your education – and to do everything you can to meet them. Your goal can be something as simple as
    doing all your homework, paying attention in class, or spending time each day reading a book. Maybe you’ll decide to get involved in an extracurricular activity, or volunteer in
    your community. Maybe you’ll decide to stand up for kids who are being teased or
    bullied because of who they are or how they look, because you believe, like I do, that all kids deserve a safe environment to study and learn. Maybe you’ll decide to take better care of yourself so you can be more ready to learn. And along those lines, I hope you’ll all wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school when you don’t feel well, so we can keep people from getting the flu this fall and winter.

    Whatever you resolve to do, I want you to commit to it. I want you to really work at it. I know that sometimes, you get the sense from TV that you can be rich and successful without any hard work -- that your ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things.

    But the truth is, being successful is hard. You won’t love every subject you study. You won’t click with every teacher. Not every homework assignment will seem completely
    relevant to your life right this minute. And you won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try.

    That’s OK. Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. JK Rowling’s first Harry Potter book was rejected twelve times before it was finally published.

    Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, "I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

    These people succeeded because they understand that you can’t let your failures define
    you – you have to let them teach you. You have to let them show you what to do
    differently next time. If you get in trouble, that doesn’t mean you’re a troublemaker, it means you need to try harder to behave. If you get a bad grade, that doesn’t mean you’re stupid, it just means you need to spend more time studying.

    No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard
    work. You’re not a varsity athlete the first time you play a new sport. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice. It’s the same with your schoolwork. You might have to do a math problem a few times before you get it right, or read something a few times before you understand it, or do a few drafts of a paper before it’s good enough to hand in.

    Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new. So find an adult you trust – a parent, grandparent or teacher; a coach or counselor – and ask them to help you stay on track to meet your goals.
    And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you feel like other
    people have given up on you – don’t ever give up on yourself. Because when you give up
    on yourself, you give up on your country.

    The story of America isn’t about people who quit when things got tough. It’s about
    people who kept going, who tried harder, who loved their country too much to do
    anything less than their best.

    It’s the story of students who sat where you sit 250 years ago, and went on to wage a
    revolution and found this nation. Students who sat where you sit 75 years ago who
    overcame a Depression and won a world war; who fought for civil rights and put a man
    on the moon. Students who sat where you sit 20 years ago who founded Google, Twitter
    and Facebook and changed the way we communicate with each other.

    So today, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? What problems are
    you going to solve? What discoveries will you make? What will a president who comes
    here in twenty or fifty or one hundred years say about what all of you did for this

    Your families, your teachers, and I are doing everything we can to make sure you have
    the education you need to answer these questions. I’m working hard to fix up your
    classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn. But
    you’ve got to do your part too. So I expect you to get serious this year. I expect you to put your best effort into everything you do. I expect great things from each of you. So don’t let us down – don’t let your family or your country or yourself down. Make us all proud. I know you can do it.

    Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.

    ...And Now For An Opposing Viewpoint

    Don't stay in school.
    Don't try hard.

    That should make all of those parents who don't want their kids to hear this dangerous and subversive speech happy...



    NFL Rankings - Preseason

    1. Pittsburgh Steelers
      They were the last team to win a meaningful game...

    2. San Diego Chargers
      They get to play 6 games against the pathetic AFC West

    3. New England Patriots
      Nice additions, no huge losses (except Seymore) and Brady is back

    4. New York Giants
      I had to put an NFC team on the list eventually

    5. Indianapolis Colts
      They'd be higher if Dungy was still coaching this team

    6. Philadelphia Eagles
      "Eagles were RETARTED to let Brian Dawkins go!"

    7. Tennessee Titans
      Not as good as last year, but still good

    8. Minnesota Vikings
      Favre, let's keep those blocks clean...

    9. Carolina Panthers
      Great defense and maybe the best RB and WR in the NFC

    10. Arizona Cardinals
      Super Bowl losers always stink it up the next year...

    ESPN NFL Power Rankings.
    Fox Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    CBS Sports NFL Power Rankings.
    NFL Standings


    Labels: ,

    Friday, September 04, 2009


    What's Gonna Happen?

    A couple of years ago, about this time of the year, I stated that our long national nightmare was over. I'm talking NFL. Baseball is cool, Basketball is fun to watch, even college football is great, but NOTHING beats the NFL. It's the real national pastime.

    Every team has hopes and dreams. Every fan is hopeful, there was a draft, every team has new talent, everything will be different for every team, for better or worse.

    Which leads to every team will finish somewhere. So here's my predictions for the upcoming NFL season:

    1. New York Giants

    2. Dallas Cowboys

    3. Philadelphia Eagles

    4. Washington Redskins

    Probably the best division in football. The Giants lost a lot and have lots of questions at WR, but their D makes them the favorite. Dallas has a pretty new stadium but the same problems as last year. Philly is better than last year, but last year they were 9-6-1 and dropped a lot of games they shouldn't have. The 'Skins could surprise and I really like Jason Campbell.

    1. Green Bay Packers

    2. Minnesota Vikings

    3. Chicago Bears

    4. Detroit Lions

    Regardless of the additions to this division, Aaron Rodgers is the best QB in the NFC North. The Vikings were a good team last year, now they have Favre, that's gotta help, right? While the loss of Kyle Orton would cripple most teams, this Cutler kid could be pretty good. I predict it, The Lions will win a game this year.

    1. Carolina Panthers

    2. Atlanta Falcons

    3. New Orleans Saints

    4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers

    The Panthers still play defense and can run the ball. A drop-off for Atlanta's second year QB? Probably. The Saints seem to be a trendy pick, but they go nowhere without a defense. Tampa Bay fired their newly hired Offensive Coordinator. What's up with that?

    1. Seattle Seahawks

    2. Arizona Cardinals

    3. San Francisco 49ers

    4. St. Louis Rams

    A healthy 'Hawks team wins this easily. Not only do the Cards not win the West, they don't make the playoffs. The 'Niners need a QB but didn't get one when they had the first overall pick. The Rams are a trainwreck.

    1. New England Patriots

    2. Miami Dolphins

    3. Buffalo Bills

    4. New York Jets

    With Brady back. we know what the Pats are. The Dolphins won't sneak up on anyone this year. The Bills were close last year, but they're no closer this year. Teams with rookie starting QB's don't go to the playoffs, I don't care about last year.

    1. Pittsburgh Steelers

    2. Baltimore Ravens

    3. Cleveland Browns

    4. Cincinnati Bengals

    Pittsburgh is better than the team that won it all last year. Ravens? Defense! Browns? Offense! Bengals? Cursed!

    1. Indianapolis Colts

    2. Tennesse Titans

    3. Houston Texans

    4. Jacksonville Jaguars

    If I'm completely wrong about any division, this is the one. The Colts have big turnover in staff, but the talent remains. I'm not exactly sure how the Titans are this good, but they are. I always think that this is the year the Texans finish above .500. Somebody has to finish fourth, why not the Jags?

    1. San Diego Chargers

    2. Denver Broncos

    3. Oakland Raiders

    4. Kansas City Chiefs

    The only surprise here is that Oakland won't be last. The Chargers have no competition here. The Broncos are second because they're least dysfunctional of the remaining teams, which isn't saying much. Raiders? [shakes head] Chiefs? See comment above about Buccaneers, enjoy the second coming of Elvis Grbac at QB.


    Pittsburgh over whoever stumbles out of the NFC.



    Wednesday, September 02, 2009

    You know, some of these stories are pretty good. I never knew mice lived such interesting lives.

    And as an added bonus..... from the same episode, The Wisdom of Marge!

    I guess one person can make a difference, but most of the time, they probably shouldn't.

    Itchy and Scratchy and Marge


    Tuesday, September 01, 2009

    In a haze these days, I pull up to the stop light
    I can feel that something's not right
    I can feel that someone's blasting me with hate
    And bass, sendin' dirty vibes my way
    'Cuz my Great, Great, Great, Great, Grandad
    Made someone's Great, Great, Great, Great Grandaddies slaves
    It wasn't my idea
    It wasn't my idea
    Never was my idea
    I just drove to the store for some Preparation-H

    Ben Folds
    "Rockin' the Suburbs"
    Rockin' the Suburbs


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