Globex Corporation Newsletter

This is completely pointless, no woman from my past will ever read this, but it makes me feel better. In the interest of fairness, I'm not using any names, though each piece of advice is specific for (at least) one woman. Those who've been around me during some of these relationships may find it fun to match the advice to a specific woman...

There are other ways to show affection
I appreciate the attention, particularly that kind of attention, but there are other ways to show affection, let's try some of those.

If you want me to know stuff about you, answer questions
Since you didn't talk about yourself or were evasive when I asked questions, I figured that you didn't want me to know anything in depth about you. Then one of the myriad reasons you gave me for breaking up with me was "you don't get me." Go figure...

You're smarter than me. It's a compliment. Deal with it.

If you're leaving then leave
If you mean it then I want you to

Hotel Lights
"Follow Through"
Hotel Lights

Your boobs are only small because you think they are
I dated a girl later who had smaller boobs. I mentioned that to her and she said "they're not small." They weren't because she didn't think they were. Attitude.

Your boobs are large, I'm not the only man who's noticed
Every guy you work with mentioned it to me. I never brought it up. I really am the good guy in this.

You were a 'College Republican,' so what...
I can't believe that the worst thing any man has ever done in a relationship was to mention that you were in an organization that does not reflect your current political affiliation.

That game you and your friends played trying to get men to do menial tasks for you may have been 'fun' for you, but it's mean
...and it's sick. You wanted me to leave my apartment, drive to your place of work and bring you a soda from the machine in your lobby? That's pretty fucking twisted. You tried to make me feel like an ass for not doing it. Then I find out it's just a game you played to fuck with men. Thanks for giving Social Workers from Iowa a bad name. And, no, I won't pay for your fucking sofa either.

When you break up with me, I'd like a reason why
I'm trying to improve myself here...

If you tell me right off that "This will end badly" it probably will

Please don't ever treat any other man like this
This one is general and applies to every woman I've been involved with.

BOJ

Labels: Lists